Please help me welcome my dear friend Addison Albright to the blog today. She’s answered my holiday questions and she also has a very special treat for you: a flash fiction story based on three prompts I gave my guests. If they wanted, I asked them to choose one of the prompts and write a flash fiction story, but since Addison is amazing, she incorporated all three of them! It features her regular flash fiction characters Harrison and Mason and their adorable kid Jaxon.
Seriously, guys, I laughed out loud when I read it. Especially the ending. It’s fantastic.
Thank you for this gem, Addison. I really appreciate your generosity and I’m happy my readers get a chance to read this fun story. ❤️
Which one of your characters would make the worst Santa and why?
I’d have to go with Sam Miller-Greene from ’Til Death Do Us Part. I suppose he’d do a great job pretending to be Santa, but I don’t see him wanting to deceive Buddy/Aiden into believing the Santa myth. I picture Sam and Henry explaining the stories to Aiden then encouraging his imagination as they play along without actually trying to deceive him.
Partly it would go against Sam’s nature to do otherwise, but also, how would they explain why Santa never visited Aiden on the island all those years? I can’t see inquisitive Aiden buying into it anyway, so better to be upfront with him in the first place.
What is the worst gift you ever received and why?
When we were kids, one year my mother wrapped up a large Christmas candy item and put it in our stockings. My sisters and brother each got a huge chocolate Santa. I got a humongous candy cane (“because I know how much you love candy canes!”). Except I hate candy canes. I love chocolate. A big part of the disappointment wasn’t that I didn’t get the candy I would have preferred, but that I couldn’t understand how she could have not known that.
What’s the worst thing about Christmas?
The political BS that often accompanies the holiday season these days. If people want to keep their own celebrations focused on the religious aspect of it, go for it. Doesn’t bother me in the least.
But if other people want to celebrate the holiday with their families in a more secular fashion and/or acknowledge that many are celebrating religious holidays other than Christmas (“Happy Holidays!”), they should be free to do that without people blathering on about a phony “war on Christmas” or insisting that their way is the only acceptable way to celebrate. Let everybody make merry however they want.
Would you rather
– give presents or get presents? – Give
– have a white Christmas or no snow? – Depends. I grew up in upstate New York. We always had a white Christmas, and I loved that. But, they’re geared for that there, and people could still get around to their family celebrations even if there’d been a recent snow (although I suppose it sucked to be on the road crew). Where I live now in the Midwest, it takes longer for the roads to be cleared, and it’s often icier, too. It’s more difficult/dangerous to get around, so I prefer not. Maybe it’s partly a kid vs. adult mindset, but I think the regional weather and what that part of the country is set up to handle is a legit factor in my opinion. In a nutshell, I guess I like the ambiance of snow on the ground, but only if the roads are clear and safe.
– have a full on celebration with family or curl up alone with a good book and a hot beverage? – I’m an introvert, but I still like the occasional big family gathering…especially around holidays. I get enough of the curling up alone with a good book and hot beverage thing the rest of the year.
– have a real or a fake tree? – I’m going to give another wishy-washy answer. I live alone now and have a small pre-lit fake tree that is so small I don’t even have to piece it together. I love the convenience. That being said, I love a real tree as long as I’m only visiting it in someone else’s home, and I don’t have to deal with maintaining it, cleaning up the needles, or disposing of it after the holiday.
– stay in your PJs or dress up? – PJs for the win!
What’s your favorite Christmas
– candy – Terry’s Chocolate Orange. I don’t know if it’s strictly a holiday treat, but I don’t remember seeing it in stores other than around that time, and that’s the only time of year I get them.
– song – Manheim Steamroller’s Carol of the Bells
– movie – It’s close, but I think I’ll have to go with It’s a Wonderful Life over A Christmas Story. But it might depend on the day I happen to be asked (or which one I’ve seen more recently)—I waver back and forth.
– tradition – Christmas stockings.
– food – Hmm, I’m not much of a foodie. I’ll go with the traditional roast turkey.
Write a holiday themed flash fiction using either of these lines:
– I’m Santa. I don’t need a condom; I have a stocking.
– Rudolph the red nosed rabbit
(Told from Harrison’s 3rd-person POV. And additionally she’s used three prompt words I left on her blog a few weeks back: listless, uninspired, tired.)
“He actually said that?” Harrison asked.
Mason nodded, but his grin said he wasn’t concerned Jaxon was turning into a pint-sized scrooge. More like he was amused by what their son had said. Certainly “holiday-schmoliday,” wasn’t an expression they’d typically expect out of Jaxon—or at least the bah-humbug sentiment usually associated with the words wasn’t. Yeah, most likely he’d just thought it was a fun sounding word.
Now the boy was happily decorating holiday themed sugar cookies with Gramps in the kitchen. The two were surrounded by bowls of gaily colored frosting and every sort of decorative sprinkle marketing whizzes could conceive. The stacks of cookies on wire cooling racks were steadily converting from naked to flamboyantly adorned.
Harrison shrugged. “Well, if it was a mood, it looks like he’s over it.” He approached the table. “These look great!”
He picked up a vaguely stocking-shaped cookie that had pink frosting underneath a fortune in white nonpareils in alternating stripes with cinnamon red-hots. He rubbed his stomach and took an enormous bite.
Mason picked up an avocado-colored Elf and chomped off his head. “What’s the story behind the green Santa?” He directed a wink at Harrison. He knew—he was just winding them up.
Gramps hooted. “That’s not Santa Claus!”
“Help me,” Jaxon wailed, channeling The Grinch. “I’m…I’m…feeling!”
“Hmm.” Mason brow raised in mock surprise. “feeling…listless?”
At Jaxon’s giggle, Gramps added, “Uninspired?” Then affected a massive gasp and sat back in his chair. “The horror! Tell me it ain’t so!”
Laughing, Harrison picked up a spare spreading knife and snagged the final unadorned cookie: a reindeer with mutant blobs for antlers. He went with basic white frosting and covered it in blue sugar sprinkles. He added a cinnamon red-hot at the nose and a glop of chocolate frosting at the…uh…rear.
When he placed it on the rack, Gramps chortled. Jaxon guffawed and sang, “Rudolph the red-nosed rabbit…” He pinched his nose. “Had a very stinky butt!”
“Speaking of stinky butts,” Mason said. “You need a quick bath before heading to bed.”
“But I’m not even tired.” Jaxon’s jaw-cracking yawn told the real story. He got up and muttered a defeated, “Nuts.”
Harrison ruffled his hair. “At least you haven’t been roped into cleanup duty.”
Jaxon’s eyes widened as he took in the debris field that might or might not have a kitchen table buried somewhere underneath it. “I’m sooo sleepy…” He raised his arms in front of him as he staggered toward the door. “I might even be sleepwalking.”
“You’re off-duty, too.” Mason leaned down to kiss his grandfather’s weathered brow. “Thank you for handling the decorating.”
“Wasn’t a chore at all.” Gramps stifled a yawn of his own. “As you well know.”
After Gramps shuffled toward the bedrooms, Mason eyed the table. “Yikes.”
“Worth it, though.” Harrison handed him a couple clean cookie sheets and a tube of waxed paper. “You want to layer the cookies on these while I start the cleanup?”
It didn’t end up taking all that long to get it done. Before Harrison knew it, he had Jaxon tucked into bed, had made sure Gramps was comfortably settled for the night, and found Mason in their en suite bathroom, filling the large spa tub.
“Perfect.” Harrison added some lavender scented bubble bath. He squatted and swished a hand through the warm water then took a deep breath of the relaxing fragrance. “Just what the doctor ordered.”
“No. Just what Santa ordered.”
Harrison executed a double-take then laughed and shook his head.
“What in the world?” In less than a minute, Mason had managed to strip, put on a Santa hat, and hang a stocking from his—
“I’m Santa.” Mason double-flashed his eyebrows. “I don’t need a condom; I have a stocking.”
Harrison snickered and scooped up a handful of bubbles. He deftly daubed the suds along Mason’s jaw.
“There.” He added a lingering kiss as Mason’s hands glided up his back. “Now you’re a proper Santa.”
Addison Albright is a writer living in the middle of the USA. Her stories are gay (sometimes erotic) romance in contemporary settings. Her education includes a BS in Education with a major in mathematics and a minor in chemistry. Addison loves spending time with her family, reading, popcorn, boating, french fries, “open window weather,” cats, math, and anything chocolate. She loves to read pretty much anything and everything, anytime and anywhere.
Addison is the author of…
- Cultivating Love
- Vows 1 – ’Til Death Do Us Part
- Vows 2 – From This Day Forward
- Vows 3 – To Love and To Cherish
- Snapshots, a collection of short stories
- Dream On (book 1) – Closets Are for Clothes (Coming in Feb., 2018 to JMS Books, LLC)
You can find more flash fiction featuring Harrison and Mason on Addison’s website, here: https://authoraddisonalbright.com/free-stuff/flash-fiction/adventures-with-harrison-and-mason/
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